


It Was Only Dinner

by ellerean



Category: Free!
Genre: Awkward Boyfriends, First Dates, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-06
Updated: 2014-01-06
Packaged: 2018-01-07 18:15:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1122837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellerean/pseuds/ellerean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>We talk all the time. Why am I acting so stupid?</i> a.k.a., the trials and tribulations of the awkward first date.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It Was Only Dinner

**Author's Note:**

> Contribution to the [30 Days of Rin](http://30daysofrin.tumblr.com) birthday countdown :D

“You wanna go out some time?”

“Like … a date?”

 _A date_. It meant that Rin was coming to pick him up. It meant that Haru stood before the mirror for fifteen minutes, trying on five different outfits. It meant that he’d counted the money in his wallet three times, wondering how much he needed, wondering if Rin would even let him pay.

Rin had casually asked after joint practice. Haru hadn’t been prepared—instead of the “Yes” that he’d wanted to say, he’d requested clarification.  _A date?_  he thought, bewildered.  _With me?_

Rin looked nice when he showed up—not that he didn’t every single day. But Haru could tell that he’d spent even longer in front of the mirror than he had—the crisp, black shirt; the pressed khakis. He’d tried to push that wayward strand of hair out of his eyes, but it threatened to fall from where he’d gelled it back.

Haru smiled slightly.  _You look good._  “Ready?” he asked.

“I’m here, aren’t I?” Rin forced a laugh.

It was only dinner—Rin had suggested a seafood restaurant. Now, as they silently walked to town, Haru wondered if he should have counter-offered. Would Rin have preferred meat? Did he even  _want_  seafood? When Rin pushed his hands into his pockets, Haru felt stupid with his arms hanging limply at his sides. Was Rin disappointed that he hadn’t attempted to hold his hand?

Rin held the door open at the restaurant, allowing him to enter first. Haru muttered a barely audible “thank you” in passing. Rin had made reservations, so they were escorted to their table right away. He was grateful—Haru wasn’t sure he could stand around waiting, awkwardly staring at the other diners and not speaking to each other.

After they’d been seated, Haru watched Rin skim the menu. That strand of hair had fallen in front of his eyes again. Haru liked it—he was less  _Rin_ -like without it. He liked the way it brushed his nose, the way it fluttered against his face when he huffed.

“They have mackerel,” Rin said, not looking up. “You must be happy.”

“There’s steak, too,” Haru said. Rin smirked behind his menu.

 _Like … a date?_  he had said, staring at Rin in the locker room.

Haru couldn’t forget the way he had scratched the back of his head, looking past Haru just to avoid his eyes. “If you want to,” he’d said. “I mean, whatever.”

That was when the “Yes” had come, too eagerly. Rin’s eyes had widened slightly, like he’d been  _surprised_  that he’d affirmed.

Now, Haru watched Rin close his menu. Their eyes met. Haru forced himself to not look away. “You look—”

“Ready to order?” the waitress interrupted, annoyingly cheerful. One mackerel dinner, one steak—well done—their typical fare; orders that they could have placed for each other. The table seemed huge when the oversized menus were taken away, the space between them wide as the ocean. The candle centerpiece flickered in the room’s dim lighting.

“What were you saying?” Rin asked, once the waitress left.

_You look really nice tonight._

Haru shrugged. “I don’t remember.”

The restaurant wasn’t overtly romantic—some couples were seated at small tables, like themselves, men and women leaned over in hushed conversation. Haru folded his hands in his lap, watching a man reach for his girlfriend’s hands across the table. Rin’s hands, too, were hidden, likely twisted in knots like his own. They set their hands atop the table at the same time, looking away from each other like they hadn’t noticed.

“I like that shirt,” Rin said. “Is it new?”

Haru examined his gray-and-purple striped shirt. It  _was_  new, kind of; his mother had bought it for Christmas that year, hoping he’d have an occasion to wear it.  _Maybe you’ll ask out a nice girl_ , she’d said, as he hung it in the back of the closet.

“Yeah,” he replied. “I’m still not sure if I like it.”

“ _I_  think it looks good.” Rin’s cheeks flushed. “I swear, I changed about eight times and still ended up with this boring thing.”

“I like that boring thing,” Haru said, his voice soft.  _It looks really good on you_. He lowered his eyes.

Across the room, a girl was giggling. Rin snorted, the only sign that they’d both heard her. Haru couldn’t help but smile, staring down at his hands, but noticed the way Rin watched him.  _This is annoying_ , Haru thought, spreading his napkin on his lap.  _We talk all the time. Why am I acting so stupid?_

“Wanna hear what Nitori did during practice?” Rin asked suddenly. “Man, what an idiot.” Haru nodded, half-listening. He didn’t really care what Nitori did, but Rin was  _talking_ , and it was better than the heavy silence. While he shared Nitori’s antic—something about forgetting to restock fresh towels—Haru tried to think of something,  _anything_  to say when he was finished. His mind was only filled with the pool, or something Makoto had said during lunch. Was that all they had in common? Some mutual friends, a love for the water?

 _It’s not enough_ , Haru thought, as Rin fell silent.  _Why did he want to go out with_  me _? He’s probably bored_. Haru forced a smile, mirroring Rin’s low laugh, studying the right way to respond.

It was a relief when the waitress appeared with their dinners. She’d switched their orders; Rin visibly winced when the plate of mackerel was set before him. When her back was turned, they quickly swapped. Haru nearly dropped his plate when his hand brushed Rin’s; his skin was warm and surprisingly smooth. His fingers trembled as he tried to pick up his chopsticks.

“Hey, Haru.” Rin tilted his head, studying him over the flickering candle. When he smiled, it was genuine. Haru knew him well enough to understand  _that_ , at least. In reply Haru simply met his eyes, fascinated by the way the candlelight reflected in them. But the softness of his features quickly faded as he held up a strip of steak between his chopsticks. “Want some?”

“Okay. Do you want some mackerel?”

He didn’t respond right away, briefly scrunching his nose at the prospect. “Sure. It’s a night of adventure, right?”

Haru had expected him to drop the steak onto his plate, swapping one for the other, but instead he held his chopsticks over the table. Haru stared at the piece of meat as he leaned in, allowing Rin to place it into his open mouth.

“It’s good,” Haru said, once he swallowed. He wasn’t lying—he was never a fan of meat, but it wasn’t overdone and the seasoning was just right.  _Maybe steak could be okay_ , he thought, breaking off a piece of mackerel for Rin.

He followed suit, but Rin cupped Haru’s hand as he held out the fish. He opened his mouth wide, sucking the end of Haru’s chopsticks once the piece disappeared behind his lips. He said nothing as he chewed, and Haru felt the blush creep into his cheeks as he stared at his chopsticks.

“They make pretty good mackerel,” he finally said, after taking a sip of water.

Haru had caught the stare of a neighboring couple, hoping Rin hadn’t. They were leaned farther over the table, whispering, occasionally glancing in their direction. If it hadn’t been obvious before that they were on a date, it was  _now_ —Haru ate his fish slowly, conscious of way his chopsticks had been inside Rin’s mouth. He tried to ignore the couple, staring at Rin instead, but Rin, too, had noticed their neighbors. He turned, glaring hard.

“Idiots,” he muttered. To Haru’s surprise, he reached across the table for another piece of mackerel. “Let’s give ’em a show, eh?” Haru stared at the fish between Rin’s waiting chopsticks, glancing in his peripheral vision before accepting it. Rin didn’t pull back right away—Haru closed his eyes as Rin slowly slid the chopsticks from his closed lips. Haru tasted the subtle flavor of steak beneath the mackerel, its spices mixed with the oily fish. It was an odd sensation, but not unpleasant. He opened his eyes when Rin laughed; their neighbors had hastily turned back to each other.

They opted against dessert. Haru couldn’t stand sitting in that restaurant anymore, not speaking, hyper-aware of everyone else. He took out his wallet when the waitress dropped off the check but Rin waved it away, reminding him that  _he_  had been the one to ask  _him_  out. As if Haru could forget.

 _I’ll get it next time_ , Haru wanted to say, but only closed his wallet instead.

The night air was comfortably warm when they left, and finally Haru could breathe. As he’d watched Rin pay the bill—with credit—he couldn’t wait to get outside and go home. But now, as they walked in silence, he didn’t want to. They stood close, close enough that they  _could_  hold hands, that their arms brushed as they walked. Haru looked up toward Iwatobi High School when they passed.

“Rin,” he said, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk. “Do you want to swim?”

It was a relief to see Rin’s smile again. He immediately ran toward the school, laughing as he challenged Haru to beat him there. His stomach was heavy with mackerel and twisted nerves but he pushed himself to catch up, grumbling over Rin’s head start. They reached the gate at the same time.

“You have a suit?” Rin asked. In reply, Haru tore off his trousers to reveal the black swimsuit beneath. Rin laughed, light and easy, pulling off his own dress clothes to unveil the suit hidden beneath. They both dived into the water.

Haru was content to float on his back, feeling the slight ripple of water as Rin moved around him. Neither swam—even Haru knew it would end poorly so soon after eating—but it was enough to feel the water, to feel it with  _him_. Haru opened one eye when he was lightly splashed; only Rin’s head was visible above the water.

“I had a nice time,” Rin said.

Haru sank underwater, let out a breath, then popped up at Rin’s eye level. He touched Rin’s arm beneath the water, feeling the slight shudder of his nerves. “Me too.”

“Really?”

“What do you mean, ‘really’?” Haru pulled away. “Of course I did.”

“You … well, you didn’t say much.”

“Neither did you!” When Rin scowled he added, “So, it’ll be easier next time.”

Rin lifted an eyebrow. He inched closer, their noses almost touching. “Next time, huh?”

Haru breathed on his mouth, staring at it, unwilling to look into his eyes. Then, he kissed him.

Haru nearly pulled away when he stiffened. But then Rin’s hands loosely held his biceps, like he feared he’d break, slowly returning the kiss. Haru held his waist and pushed the water from between them, pressing their bodies together. Even though Rin’s mouth tasted like steak, he continued to kiss him.

They pulled apart, but didn’t release each other. Rin’s arms were trembling; Haru tried to hold him steady but his hands, too, were shaking too much.

Rin kissed him again, eagerly. He wrapped his legs around Haru’s waist. Haru, in return, held his bottom, as if the water alone couldn’t support him. Rin’s kiss was soft yet urgent, romantic and needy all at once. His fingers twined through Haru’s wet hair, his tongue twisted around Haru’s tongue.

Haru pouted when they broke apart. They breathed hard, foreheads pressed together. Haru wanted to kiss him again; he wanted to kiss him all night, to be surrounded by the water, encircling them, to be surrounded by Rin.

“So,” Rin said, breath hot on Haru’s mouth, “next time?”

He smiled as he rubbed the waistband of Rin’s swimsuit. “Next time.”

“When?”

Their lips brushed when Haru spoke. “Now.”

Rin smirked as he let go, drifting backward. “What were you thinking all night?” he asked. “Tell me.”

Haru looked away, but Rin slid back into his line of vision. He stared at Rin’s hair, at his eyes, at his lips. He stared at his shoulder, picturing the way that black shirt had fallen so nicely against it. “You looked really good tonight.”

He frowned, confused. “Is that all?”

Haru stared at his own hands, hazy beneath the water. “Yeah. But it sounded stupid. It— it wouldn’t come out right.” He looked at Rin, who only stared back, dazed. “You were … beautiful,” he said, testing the word, finally understanding its meaning. Rin, at his doorway; Rin, in the eighth outfit he had tried on that evening; Rin, rambling and sweating as they ate dinner. Beautiful, awkward Rin.

“Haru …” He bit down on his lip, and Haru knew he’d cry before the tears fell. “You too,” he said, choking back a sob. “God, when you opened that door, it was the only thing I could think of. You looked so good. And it— it was for  _me_.”

Haru didn’t hesitate to hug him. Rin hadn’t cried, to his surprise, but he pressed his face to Haru’s shoulder and held on tight. Haru could feel his heavy breathing, could feel the way he tried to calm himself down. He closed his eyes and stroked Rin’s hair. “Good thing the awkward first date is over,” Haru said, and Rin’s chest rumbled with laughter before they kissed again.

**Author's Note:**

> ([Here](http://trapsandpecs.tumblr.com/post/72439380208) on tumblr.)


End file.
